My Grouse: Now that Lawyers have Become Endangered Species


Children of God Praise the Lord! I have a testimony! Praise the lord again!

My testimony goes thus:

A few months ago, in this 2018, I started praying a prayer! The prayer went thus:

“O Lord my father! My father my father, Nigerian Lawyers have become endangered species. You know your child is a lawyer. Please I beg you in your mightiness, cause a certain police officer or even officers to attempt to brutalize one powerful Senior Advocate of Nigeria or even a High Court Judge. In fact to make it more potent, let it be a Supreme Court Justice! My father, this is the only way I see that will make the lives of lawyers safe. Please papa, even if it is just to tear cloth small. No bruise, no slap!”

I started praying this prayer when I realized that this brutality has to be done in high places for our lives to be secured again. But one day, as I was praying, the devil, the son of perdition strolled pass and began to distract me. Then he began to speak to my spirit:

“Impossible request you are making of the Almighty mere mortal”

In my high spirit, I responded:

“Get thee behind me Satan! My prayers will be answered and I shall testify. Very soon, a SAN will be brutalized or even a Justice, by the Nigerian Police! Then Lawyers will arise! the NBA President will arise! Then Prof. Osinbajo will walk up to the President and discuss our safety! It is a noble prayer! God will answer it!”

“Hahahahahah!” The devil laughed! “Little minded fellow! Pray, tell, where are these your colleagues brutalized?”

“Huh? At the police station of course!” I responded! Then the reality immediately settled in!

“Hahahahah!” The devil laughed again and left me to my despair.

I knew exactly what it was he was laughing about. I felt cold all over my body. It was at midnight. Immediately, sleep beckoned and I slept off. From that night, I suspended my prayers and retired to join everyone to complain. But guess what children of God! My testimony (ok half of it) arrived today. Amen! The Police have left the station. Yes! They now seek us out. Even in front of NBA House. To fight us in our numbers. They have even beaten a Vice Chairman of NBA. Praise the Lord! Are you guessing what I am guessing? I will go back to my war room! These guys must touch a life that matter! They must! Who is joining me? Because Police cannot tear a judge’s cloth and we are all issuing press statement and sitting down.

If you think this my prayer is not a good one because I am directing an attack to the place where it will get attention, then you may be the only Lawyer in Jerusalem of Nigeria. For instance, I have personally closed shop on police bail and police wahala. Please sir, check next door. I don’t know how much life I have left to go and test my strength with blows and slap. Mba nu! Ko le werk! You cannot be against my prayer if you have not been following this dangerous trend abeg! You can’t. We have become endangered. Period! I will support my point with statistics of reported cases of Police brutality in just 2018.

From the very beginning of January, it was Mr. Yemi Abijo who was beaten, handcuffed and made to sit on the floor with miscreants and suspected criminals by Police despite the fact that he identified himself as a lawyer. His offence? He spoke up against police harassment of another individual. NBA Ikeja the Tiger as it then was led by the indefatigable Lion of the branch Adesina went on rampage. Mbok did they stop? It’s a NO!

In February just few days apart a certain DPO Mbanefo beat up a beloved young wig Chiamaka in Anambra State. The NBA branch set up committee of SANs to deal with the matter. Well, we are still on it!

In June, it was the case of a Warri based lawyer Mr. Bernard Oyabevwe. He was beaten black and blue at the Police station. They finished him and detained him. In fact, the case took a twist when Police charged him to court for assaulting them. 84 Lawyers went to represent him. Yet, Police no gree hear word!

This one that happened in July at Owerri amuse me specially. In fact, the reason why I didn’t include Magistrates to the people that should probably be harassed may be because of this one. It was a case of arresting two lawyers inside a Magistrate court. Even the Magistrate that delivered the ruling that infuriated the police was almost lynched. Thank God for Magistrate Chambers. The two lawyers Emma Eke and Chukwuemeka Anyanwu were treated like criminals by the Police. Whither the case?

This next case, was the reason why I didn’t include elders and older lawyers at the bar in my prayer above. Your age no matter abeg.  It was in August.  He is over 30 years post call from NBA Gombe branch. His name is Joseph Kolchi Esq. This one self na Prison warders help police beat am. When they finished with him, he was admitted to the hospital. Well, his branch have gone to court or there has been settlement. I am not sure.

In October, Lukman O. Bello Esq. from Ilorin NBA branch went to bail his client. He was stripped to his boxers and beaten like a criminal and then detained. Even the intervention of his branch Chairman Mr. Akande was not enough to save him.

In the same October another one from NBA Anaocha Branch Mr. Abuchi ogbachalu was seen in a video after they had finished him threatening fire and brimstone. Nwanne got the beaten of his life doing his legitimate lawyer duty.

Just last week, NBA Jalingo branch members were in court to prosecute a fundamental right action on behalf of their member N.A Dodo Esq who was humiliated at the Police station.

Even, Evans, the alleged kidnapper’s former lawyer was not spared. They arrested him ni o. They needed to teach him a lesson or two for whatever reason.

Then this very recent one. Succinctly described by the Chairman of NBA Port Harcourt Branch: At about 2.38 pm on Thursday, the 8th of November 2018, there was an attempt by some men in civilian clothes, who we later discovered were men of the Nigeria Police Force Anti-Cultism, Port Harcourt Unit to arrest a Lawyer within the premises of the Nigerian Bar Association, Port Harcourt Branch Secretariat. A scuffle broke out in the process and some Lawyers were injured in the process by the Policemen, including the Vice Chairman of the Nigerian Bar Association, Port Harcourt Branch, Chidi B. Ekeh, Esq. who had attempted to broker peace. 

Brothers and sisters you can add your own and tell me if we are not endangered. And why I should not distance myself from the police and why I should not pray this prayer till something happens. 

So, my point exactly is this: NBA branches have protested. Police no gree hear. NBA branches have gone to court, Police no gree hear. NBA branches have issued plenty press statements and even the NBA President Mr. Paul Usoro SAN has probably had a scheduled meeting with the IG of police, yet as I write, Police may be brutalizing a lawyer somewhere that we may hear of or not.

You see, I am testifying ahead of time because, the police have left the station and are beginning to visit NBA secretariat to beat up lawyers. Who knows how their minds will work tomorrow. All I need is for them to just harass one strong mouthed SAN or a Justice of the Supreme Court. (That one too is lawyer now abi?). Don’t ask me what the Government will do. I feel it in my spirit. I just feel it in my spirit that we would eventually like the phoenix rise from the ashes of endangered species to really partners with Nigerian Police. Can I hear an Amen?

PS: If you are not a Judge, and you are not a SAN and you are not joining me in this prayer so that this testimony will be complete, I don’t know what I want to wish you o. But certainly not police harassment because your harassment will not amount to anything.

May Day! May Day! My account has been hacked! I am still looking for the writer of this useless piece!

My Grouse! Making sense unseriously!

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